Surreal......

surrealism
NOUN: A 20th-century literary and artistic movement that attempts to express the workings of the subconscious and is characterized by fantastic imagery and incongruous juxtaposition of subject matter.
surreal
ADJECTIVE: Having qualities attributed to or associated with surrealism: dreamlike quality.
Everyone has been there a time or two, that place, between worlds. That dreamlike state where it feels like your dreaming, yet awake.

The unspeakable pleasures that you are feeling............
The nightmare......................

Floating. Slipping into that time and space of nothingness.
The subconscious mind allowing a glimpse between the worlds. When you find something is to good to be true and so afraid it is a dream. Dreading waking and realizing all is not what you imagined.
So often I find myself caught in this realm. Not wanting to move for fear the pleasure I am feeling will disappear. Holding my breath, making the moment last.
God, if you choose to believe, created our bodies. This being had in mind the carnal pleasures flesh between flesh can feel. Our minds seeing what we want to see, and our thoughts creating the fantasy feeding into our desires. That one moment when the world stops, and all you hear is the intake of breath, and the mind shatters, and everything comes rushing back. Thoughts, fears, conscious thought.
Is this what connects us to others? The energetic sex drive? Is it that moment?

As I age, the world seems to be moving so fast and I am standing still watching it happen. The faster the days go by, the more alive I feel, yet, I hang on the edge of that cliff.
To much of my life has been wasted on negative energy. It has surrounded me. Clouded my brain, and left me wanting. When I focused on change, my world became different. I had doubts that I deserved a better life. A more satisfying career. A deeper connection to self seemed a dream, that I was not even worthy of that. All sprouted from fear and self doubt. What is so wrong with having a successful life? Why do we question when things are so good?
I lay in wait for that "other shoe" to be dropped, only to validate the fear that it is to good to be true. Acceptance is the key. Accepting that I do deserve to be happy, to enjoy my life, however I want to live it, and understand that only through struggle and strife can I move forward and grow as an individual. It doesn't mean I deserve "bad things to happen". It means that sometimes it just does. No matter the good karma I put out in the universe, not everyday is perfect. Choices made have consequences. Actions taken have reactions. But, there will be moments that life challenges me. Do I run from it? Do I face it head on? Do I understand that it isn't always about me......

With life comes death.
With pleasure comes pain.
With love comes heartache.

Only by the choices made in these circumstances can we learn and grow. Taking the steps to enrich our lives with wisdom and understanding.

All good things do come to an end. But with that end, comes new beginnings, new experiences, and more opportunities.

If I stop time by holding my breath, only by allowing self to inhale once again can the feelings overtake me, and I soar to new heights.